Well...The 'House' Move's not happening...

But the Blog move is.

I'm experimenting (and so far happy with) Typepad. For a few days, I'll be moving these posts over there.

The new one is still KateThoughts but at this address.

I'll play with both while I'm working this out. I hope you'll subscribe to both for awhile. :)
I'll let you know when/if I take this one down.

ttfn

Yum-O!!!

Chocolate Cake!

equal parts Frangelico and vodka in a shooter
followed immediately by a sugared lemon wedge!!!

Can't explain the chemistry of that combination, but your mouth will think it's chocolate cake.
I s#%* thee not!

Personal Responsibility - Where Has It Gone?

In the news recently...

This was about ringing cell phones in a courtroom gallery and no one (all adults) willing to say, "It was me, Judge, I apologize".

Wonder if they've learned anything. Wonder if they have kids.

The Funniest Thing I've Read in Ages

Why Females Should Avoid a 'Girls Night Out' After They are Married!

The other night I was invited out for a night with "the girls".
I told my husband that I would be home by midnight, "I promise"!

Well, the hours passed and the margaritas went down way too easy.
Around 3 am, a bit loaded, I headed for home.

Just as I got in the door, the cuckoo clock in the hall started up and cuckooed 3 times.

Quickly, realizing my husband would probably wake up, I cuckooed another 9 times.

I was really proud of myself for coming up with such a quick-witted solution in order to escape a possible conflict with him. Even when totally smashed...
3 cuckoos + 9 cuckoos totals 12 cuckoos...MIDNIGHT!

The next morning my husband asked me what time I got in, and I told him, "midnight".

He didn't seem mad at all.
Whew! Got away with that one!

Then he said, "We need a new cuckoo clock".

When I asked him why, he said, "Well, last night our clock cuckooed three times,
then said, "oh, shit",
cuckooed 4 more times,
cleared its throat,
cuckooed another 3 times,
giggled,
cuckooed twice more,
and then tripped over the coffee table and farted".

I'm laughing out loud really! I got this in an email from a friend...a married girlfriend.
I tried to find the source for you, and to give credit where it's due; but, when I 'googled' it, I found it everywhere with no one taking or giving credit. So here it is. Enjoy! :>))

Feast or Famine - Literally

Remember the post about the closing of the forest? Well, it's open now. We've had rain.
I mean RAIN!

The data I've found so far shows that all of this year's rainfall (every day) is setting records. If I'm reading it correctly, one map on Wunderground proves that. Last year's rainfall doesn't even show for most days because there wasn't any.

This year the state is experiencing flooding in places that haven't seen water in years. People are being driven from homes in low-lying areas, entire villages were temporarily cut off from the rest of the world because their roads were washed out or covered in rocks/boulders washed down from above. Thankfully, crews get on that sort of thing quickly here.
Ruidoso has been fairly lucky unless you live in a couple of trailer parks near the river (which is actually a river now, and not just a tiny creek). And when we consider tsunamis and hurricanes and broken levees, then Ruidoso is not unlike living in heaven.

I said all of that, to say this...
When we step WAY back and get a little perspective, is there not some global balance in all of this? Is that too long a view? Can I be compassionate about the individuals who suffer from weather catastrophies and famine and wars and still remain spiritually in balance and aware of a 'bigger' balance? Does the bigger balance really exist?

I think so.
Those of you who garden might understand this analogy.
Things die in your garden: bugs or disease attack the roses, the neighbor's dog digs up the petunias, your gutter overflowed last summer and drowned the whatever...

Do you still have a nice garden? Don't you still enjoy it? Isn't it still the place you go for solace, for something to nurture, for some quiet time and a sense of 'getting back to the earth'?
Have you ever experienced these events or conditions and thought, 'wow, god is out to get me', or 'I guess I'm not supposed to have a garden', or 'what am I doing wrong'?

I think of things like this. And I wonder if I have any compassion at all, sometimes.
I read the stories of real famine in SO many parts of the world, places that have no soil, no rain, no systems of irrigation, where generations have survived on the edge of starvation. I think of the thousands of truckloads of food and supplies that have been sent, with no real change whatsoever in the number of people still starving. In fact, the numbers seem to be actually growing. I've just spent about an hour 'googling' world hunger, starving populations, statistics on death by malnutrition, etc. The numbers are stagering. One article says 852 million people across the world are hungry, up from 842 million a year ago: a 10,000,000 (that's ten MILLION) increase in 1 year. I think of hungry little girls hanging on to mom, who have grown up to be hungry mothers holding on to their sweet little hungry children. And I think of the cantalope that I forgot, and let spoil, and threw out yesterday....
There are literally hundreds of organizations whose purpose is to feed hungry people. Why are the numbers growing?

I'm just asking...

Read Ishmael by Daniel Quinn. Is it the answer? I don't know; certainly, maybe ONE of the answers. It makes sense to me.

Can I find my compassion? What do I do with it?
I give things to my local food bank. I don't give anything to organizations trying to address hunger in areas that cannot support food production where the people are. I'll donate to buy a goat or dig a well...
Sometimes I think I'm really cold-cold-cold.
Sometimes I think like Daniel: when the food supply diminishes the population of the animals/humans who eat that food diminishes - as it should. As it does in all other animal species.

I'm just asking...

A Beautiful Quote

This, posted by sister-blogger, Kristie, really touched me today.

"You are a treasure and recognized as such. You are completely unique in all the universe. Your gifts are unique, your presence, all that you are is unique and is calibrated to be the exact note that is required to make the chord complete. You are what completes this moment, just as you are. So sing out and let us hear you. Shine out and let us see you. The universe awaits the beauty of your song, embraces the beauty of your song, even if it is at time sung haltingly, even if there are periods of long silence. No matter what, you are deeply loved and deeply treasured."
Author - Carrie Hart

Thanks, Kristie.


It's not surprising that a music metaphor would be especially touching to me. This one is great because of its reference to harmony.
That's a big key for me: musical harmony; spiritual harmony; planetary harmony; and the harmony of relationships.

Ever Onward

Enough, already! All computers - all software has glitches. Click on things, search, and MOST OF ALL do not be afraid to punch buttons. Enough said about that.

**********************************************************************************

I'm just going to ramble awhile about what's going on with me in a spiritual sense...

One thing I discovered about my angst over the identity of god came to light the other night when we were watching a broadcast of the Gaither Gospel Hour. (yes, I know...hehehe, don't tell)
The Gaither Vocal Band was singing a song I just could not get my mind around, so I started wandering off and watching faces.

• 1st, the music - the harmonies are just spectacular. It can transport you, and clearly does transport many.

• 2nd, there is a comfort and a passion in turning oneself over so completely to the music, and to the object of the music.

• 3rd, you become a member of a special community when the music is pounding and your brothers & sisters are all carried along with you.

• 4th, ALL of these things (are probably others, as well), especially 'congregation' are exactly what I miss about traditional Christian religion.

Wisely, those Christian music ministers are adding tons of new music, too. There are now love songs, rock songs, even Rap songs and more in the Christian genre.
(So far, I haven't found a foot-tapping Buddhist chant in 4-part harmony. got a link?)
And they're putting the music out there without the preaching (on TV & in CDs and such) so that one just gets caught up and swept away...mindlessly swept away, in my opinion, so that messages stick without the process of thought ever being attached to it. Granted, most listeners (I suppose) are already convinced.

What I'm actually saying here is this: The 'trappings' of my past religious experience, and the 'naming' that happens in virtually all religions I've studied or looked at, are what I was missing so terribly that I felt a HUGE need to fill that void. And I called the void God/Goddess/god/Nature/Cosmic Mind/Whatever....

In spite of the fact that Christianity (especially the fundamental variety) does not and cannot work for me any longer, I was still trying to shove my new spiritual experiences into the same mold. When those experiences left gaps or hung over the edges of the mold, I assumed that it was the fault of the experiences AND NOT THE FAULT OF AN OUTDATED MOLD.

In actual fact there is No Fault at all...just a poor fit. for me. I'm only talking about ME.

I condemn no particular religion. I talk the most about the Christian religion because that is where my experience lies. But my spiritual experience rests completely in love and compassion. I'm reading mostly these days about Buddhist (& Taoist & Zen) practices and practitioners. They resonate more completely with me than anything at which I've looked so far.

If I were to contemplate doing battle over this subject (and I don't), it would be a contest between religion & spirituality.
I believe that spiritual matters take on a different personality when they become religions. And I believe they become religions when they need to rent a hall, or pay a light bill, etc. and almost never before that moment.
Jesus taught love, compassion, giving, gratitude, inclusion, and 'all that I am, you are'. The book of rules came much later.

What religions seem to be teaching now (among other things) is division, judgment, exclusion, and 'we are not worthy'. Well, IF there is a god, and IF s/he made us, I very certain that we are not junk, not broken, not worthless sinners.

What's cool for me in this discussion now, is that I don't have to know the answer anymore.
I don't have to know the name of god, or even if there is one. (name or god, take your pick)
I don't have to convince anyone - no proselytizing required.
I don't have to form opinions about your lifestyle (or your clothes, your color, or your religion).

The only things that my spiritual yearnings require of me are these:

• that I hold myself to very high standards of personal integrity,
• that I practice love & compassion - first with myself and then to all others, and
• that I take small steps & do as little harm as possible while I strive for perfection.

I breathe much easier these days, and interestingly, I even choose to get on the treadmill more often. :)

Peace to you.

New Browser

Virtually all of my (current) Blogger problems were fixed instantly when I installed the Firefox Browser (now linked in sidebar). Seems that Blogger and Google and Foxfire/Mozilla all share common owners, etc. They are made to work well together.

I'm not totally sure that I'm happy about that...feels a little incestuous.

Through most of the reading I did I found that multiple browsers are often recommended. It makes some sense. If something doesn't work well in one, it will be fine in another. For example, this blog still has a dropped sidebar in IE (Internet Explorer). And, yes, that still bothers me.
(It's NOT that I have OCD issues, it's just that I expect perfection EVERYWHERE!)
Ah, well...
further spiritual development will certainly take care of THAT issue!

Also, if you keep multiple email addresses as many do, you can have a different browser open for each and not have to be continually logging in & out.

There are 3 things that I just LOVE about the new Foxfire browser:

1. TABBED BROWSING: That means I can have multiple web pages open at the same time without opening multiple browsers; I can 'tab' between open pages and not loose my place. Right now, I have Refdesk, this blogger post editor, and Weather all open at once.
   
2. FIREFOX SEARCH BAR: That's a neat little feature that lets me hold multiple (many) search engines at the ready up in my toolbar area. I can click on a drop-down menu, choose the one I want (like FoodTV Recipes), then type the search criteria (like 'paella') and BOOM here it comes. TOO too easy!
3. SPELL-CHECKER: There is a great one in the toolbar that works just about everywhere you might be typing! Obviously, my experience with it is still limited, but I love it so far.
   

I'm still learning, but I think this was a good choice. And it may eliminate the need to pay Typepad for a better blog space. We'll see. Meanwhile, you lose nothing by trying it out.

TTFN

An Answer

OK.
As you can see my posts are back. (all but one)
I spent a ton of time reading Blogger Help, searching forums, etc. I found a blogger here who has answered my question in a number of ways.

Not only can I now upload pictures, but I can do 5-6 at a time. I can't reposition them quite as easily, but I'll practice loading them first (before the text) in the future (per Laura's suggestion).

I do have one remaining error in one post: I get an HTML font error message when I try to republish Li'l Bit's Lament. I'm heading back to my friendly blogger for help on that.

*Fixed this in an amazingly easy way. Per a fellow blogger on Blogger Help, I just clicked on the box that says, "don't show me any more HTML errors for this page" and BOOM, it's all ok and published just fine, with NO errors. :)

working on a sidebar issue...

So this will be up and down for awhile... (as is the sidebar!)

also having trouble posting pictures...

If you're a Blogger user and have suggestions, let me know.
I've been all over the Blogger site and to several blogs on tips and tricks.

AARRGGGGGGGHHHH!!

I've got all the posts back but three.... I'll get it figured out sooner or later...
seems to have to do with the photos...

Enlightenment is not a Process...

...it's an Event.
Or, more accurately, a series of events.

Sisters, I woke up.
and am eagerly anticipating the next awakening.

It rattles my little ol' fundamental heart to actually say it, but since I'm watching the awakening taking place with my own eyes, it is difficult to ignore or discount. Just the fact that I see it is proof to me of opened eyes, which are usually (and in THIS case) connected to an open heart.

That part of me that so loves the angst of those other days (like yesterday :)) is moderately disconcerted, primarily because this Enlightenment Moment marks a differnt place....


TTFN
I'm getting caught up in the words when what I want is to be in the experience......back later with more... :)

Shaula's cats

Shaula told us yesterday that her two cats, Mufasa and Rafiki, go up to Li'l Bit's grave in the evening and just sit there. Mufasa sits right on top.
Seems almost like they are keeping a vigil.

Interesting and very cool.
and very touching... :)

Here's a distraction for you...

This is a ColdPlay video - a band...music's fine; it's the video... !?
youtube

I can't get a handle on this. I'd love to see your comments.

On one hand I say, 'you GO, girl!'. On another I think...exploitation...?
Costumes are troublesome to me, too. (I admit to a bunch of my own baggage on this subject.)

Lament

Our beautiful baby girl left us this morning.
Her name is Li'l Bit, affectionately known as Lard Butt.
She had the silkiest fur I've ever touched.















She was a talker, too. She could say 'I love you', and 'Hello'. She talked all the time, but these were the phrases we were sure of. We always knew when she wanted something; she didn't stop talking until we got up to satisfy her demands.




She could climb chain-link fences. This is right outside of our office window. She had a little ledge where she could watch the birds at the feeders. She loved to come and go through the window there.









Here, she's shoulder deep in catnip & mums, and, as usual, on the alert.

One day I was showing a friend's 4-month-old baby the catnip, letting him smell and touch. Li'l Bit (who usually avoids strangers) came down from our Stardeck, came immediately to the catnip and started patrolling between the plant and the baby and me.

OK--it's her catnip. We got it.








Joel wrote some sweet words to our friends who knew her. I include them here.

"This morning Little Bit crawled up in between us, had a
heart attack and died. We have buried her at our friend Shaula’s on a
beautiful little hill where she can look down at our yard. We didn’t want to leave her here in case the new property owner began digging up the property. We buried her with her toys, in several of her little towels that she would lie on throughout the house. Our hearts are broken and neither one of us can stop crying. We had her for 11 years and she gave no indication that she was feeling bad. Every morning when I get up
to go to the bathroom, still half asleep, she would follow me and rub her little cheek on the door jamb, speak to me just a bit and she did that again this morning. I went back to bed and she came up along side me, between us, and laid there. I stroked her soft little ears and sending her little I love you’s. I turned onto my side and within 30 seconds she jerked, sort of like a violent shudder. Her shudder was active enough to wake Kate. I reached for Little Bit because I thought she was stuck between the 2 mattresses. I turned the light on because I knew…
I just knew. She drew, perhaps 3 more breaths and that was it.

It is such a grievous thing when you loose a pet, a child-like being in your life. She would say hello when she came in, she would crawl up on
each of us at different times during the day and pad and purr and then go off to take her 10-hour nap in one of her secret hiding places. I hate being in the house because I am looking for her already. I always did. She had 5 hiding places and she would invariably be found in one of them.

Anyway, we know she didn’t want to make that trip in the car to San Antonio.

We were so blessed to have had her in our lives. She was joy and delight and wonderful all rolled up in this black and white ball of the softest hair you could ever imagine."

Our friend Ile, and Li'l Bit's favorite pet-sitter came to us as soon as we called her, and Shaula came down from the hill above our house. It was really wonderful to have them there. All of us prepared Li'l Bit and took her up the hill to Shaula's where we laid her.


She rests here now.
Our friend, Shaula, let us bury Li'l Bit at her house.
We couldn't contemplate leaving her here when we will be leaving so soon.

There is a new little Mountain Primrose planted there, and some of the catnip that she loved so much.




She lies on a little hill where the morning sun will shine and where she can 'see' the window where she used to sit at home.









Not that you can see it, but it's there at the bottom of the curve in the road.

This is a little piece of the garden where she rests.

So, today is for grieving. And surely several tomorrows will be spent this way, too.

There is so much about her passing - timing, speed, place, home with us -
that we are sure all is as it should be. We know that one day the grief will ease and we'll remember her with undiluted joy.

For now, we grieve.

LIGHT BULB

Wow! What an evening last night!

I got a call from a relative in that extended family I mentioned in yesterday's post followed immediately by the viewing of segment 7 in Bill Moyers' series called Faith & Reason. The juxtaposition just blows me away. Whoever or whatever may be the actual nature of that thing I sometimes call Cosmic Mind has a really cool sense of timing and an amazing sense of humor.

The relative is a faithful member of the same Christian religion in which I grew up. It's working beautifully for her and clearly satisfies her spiritual needs. The interviewee on the Moyers' show was Pema Chöndrön, an American Buddhist nun. Her religion works for her, too.

I asked my relative how I was coming across in this blog. She has been reading it (don't know how long) but has never commented. She said that I came across as ...searching. The way she said it led me to jump to the conclusion that 'searching' was a bad thing. (MY stuff, not necessarily hers - I didn't check it out.)

Here's my REVELATION: (Multi-faceted, no particular order)
- It’s the search that is important, not the answer.
- My thrashing about for answers is about my own need for drama and wanting to be ‘made special’ by some kind of cosmic communication.
- There really ARE (at least) Nine Billion Names of god. Which one I choose (or don’t choose) is probably irrelevant to you.
- NO ONE actually KNOWS who/what/where god is until s/he experiences it after this lifetime is over. What that person believes about it is her/his own belief system about it.
- A belief system may be inherited (by default or by thoughtful consideration), or it may be rationally chosen after careful research and/or experience.
- I still have ‘knee-jerk’ reactions to some things that sound like fundamental Christianity.
- What others believe about my experience is none of my business, but may make interesting conversation. (if we can avoid having expectations for each other)
- True ‘fundamentalism’ seems symptomatic of a closed mind regardless of the form that fundamentalism takes: religion, politics, whatever.
- I’m better served, spiritually, if I remain flexible and open to the possibility that I may be totally and completely wrong about ALL matters spiritual and by attaching nothing to that possibility.
- We all, each of us, have the potential of embracing fundamentalism in one realm or another.

There will be more on this subject, of course. It seems enough for now that I can (at last) RELAX. My current spiritual task is to manifest the best, kindest, most peaceful spirit I can manage in any given moment, and to model that in my heart, my behavior, my speech; indeed, in ALL aspects of my life. Doing that will also require that I translate my former angst into actual spiritual practice. For me, that will be more meditation and further exploration. If I need further revelation it will be provided. Hallelujah, amen.

Simplistic and Fundamental

"From a distance the world looks blue and green,
and the snow-capped mountains white.
From a distance the ocean meets the stream,
and the eagle takes to flight.
From a distance, there is harmony,
and it echoes through the land.
It's the voice of hope, it's the voice of peace,
it's the voice of every man.

From a distance we all have enough,
and no one is in need.
And there are no guns, no bombs, and no disease,
no hungry mouths to feed.
From a distance we are instruments
marching in a common band.
Playing songs of hope, playing songs of peace.
They're the songs of every man.

God is watching us. God is watching us.
God is watching us from a distance.

From a distance you look like my friend,
even though we are at war.
From a distance I just cannot comprehend
what all this fighting is for.
From a distance there is harmony,
and it echoes through the land.
And it's the hope of hopes, it's the love of loves,
it's the heart of every man.
It's the hope of hopes, it's the love of loves.
This is the song of every man.

And God is watching us, God is watching us,
God is watching us from a distance."
sung by Bette Midler (don't know if she wrote it)

How far away do we have to get to see it that way, too?

I admit that I am having a good deal of trouble these days about the nature of god - or nature as god - or god's name, and what have you...

And I KNOW that I don't understand all the points of view about things religious, particularly when war and killing become involved...

But, is not the basic fundamental teaching of ALL religions love & peace?
What am I missing?
Explain the (oxymoronic) meaning of 'holy war', please.

I was listening to the Dixie Chicks newest CD earlier today. What they wrote (even if in anger and hurt) was some powerful music with VERY moving lyrics. Now, they were a little angrier than I might have been (or not). But it seems to me that they turned a tidal wave of hate and anger that was focused at them into some wonderful poetry and some interesting lessons for us.
And I even grew up in Lubbock. They are not wrong about that place, either. And even that does not make Lubbock a bad place.
It just points to some weird thinking that goes on in the minds of some.

I confess that I just don't get it.

Joel and I were discussing it (again) today on a short road trip.
Spirit v. religion, I mean.
(My background is Christian, very fundamental Christianity) so, how did we get from Jesus and 'love thy neighbor' to where we are today? I've listened to some members of my extended family and old friends from the church I grew up in, talk about gays (did I mention I'm lesbian?), about Muslims, about our borders...about countless topics where they prove to me that there is NO 'love thy neighbor' in their minds at all. But they're Christian, so they are right in their own eyes. I'm not Christian, so I must be wrong... ?

I'll bet that's true everywhere. I'll bet that right next door to that Muslim fundamentalist who's throwing (and wearing!) bombs, is a family who just wants to live in peace with their neighbors and have the right to believe what is true for them.

I know there are turf wars and oil wars and religious wars.
I know that every side has right ideas and wrong ideas.
I've tried to find out a little about the basic beliefs of most of the major religions (and some of the minor ones) in the world. I read more blogs and news sources than most people I know, and I have in inkling of how little I really understand about the nature of the fighting/hating/grasping that I see all around us.
What I have not been able to find is ANY basic religious text that teaches that God Hates or that God kills. What am I missing?

I do know that this country, and perhaps others/all, has produced a huge flock of sheep that would rather be told what to do and think than to search for their own answers. Is that what is wrong with all of us? Maybe it's that, combined with the possibility that those in control of our religious organizations may be really wolves in the clothing of sheep.

'Organization' is a buzz word for me, too.
It seems that there is a great deal of money and power residing in religious organizations.
And in this country, it's non-taxable money in most cases. Hmmmm....
It seems that proselytising is very like marketing.
Results = more people = more money = more power. Hmmmm...

So I blunder along, seeking spirit (Spirit) rather than religion;
saying I'm not Christian, but not knowing what else I might be;
longing for a nunnery without a 'religious' leader; reading Lao Tzu and watching my knee jerk when I hear the word 'bible';
thinking maybe Laura's right, and Nature possesses the only real Law.
If that's true, to whom do I say "Thanks"?

I show my age when I long for the 'old' days when things were simpler...
even that's not right, I was young and saw the world through tinted lenses (not always rosy).

I want to imaging a different world, one where this is true:

"Imagine there's no heaven
It's easy if you try
No hell below us
Above us only sky
Imagine all the peopleLiving for today...

Imagine there's no countries
It isn't hard to do
Nothing to kill or die for
And no religion too
Imagine all the people
Living life in peace...

You may say I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will be as one

Imagine no possessions
I wonder if you can
No need for greed or hunger
A brotherhood of man
Imagine all the people
Sharing all the world...

You may say I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will live as one."
by John Lennon

Check your Computers!

I’m sending this to everyone who sent email to me since August 1, 2006, and to addresses of blogs/news to which I subscribe. (Also posting this to my blog)
My virus protection software found and isolated a computer worm named Worm/Generic.TX. It found it in this file: C:\1386\REG.EXE
Joel says this is a very important file. The file was found on 8-4-06 (midmorning) so it came into my computer within the 24 hours prior to that time.

Please run your virus protection software to check for this. And if you have software that you purchased and installed, it won’t be current enough.
We use AVG. This is free to private individuals and scans automatically EVERY DAY, and also updates itself (also automatically) very frequently – whenever new viruses and worms are identified.
Here is a link to its site: http://www.grisoft.com/doc/1 A link in the right sidebar (under Top Threats) mentions this worm.
And here is a link to the free download: download here. Read about it and download from here…
Professional and businesses can buy an upgraded version at the same site.

We’ve used this software for several years: it has NEVER let me down. I HIGHLY recommend it!

I DO NOT KNOW for sure that the worm came to me from any of you. I subscribe to several news links and to several bloggers.
I am 95% certain that I did not send it out accidentally since I rarely ‘forward’ anything and AVG had it isolated very quickly.
I just think it would be wise to check out your systems.